Monday, August 14, 2006

I request that you refrain from testing my gangsta

Hello from lunchbreakland:
Little Known Steelers Fact #2: Which Pittsburgh Steeler named Bettis holds the record for most rum-infused sheet cake eaten during halftime (with his helmet on)?

If you guessed Jerome, you are obviously not a true scholar of history. Purdue product Tom Bettis had a dynamite 1962 season linebacking with the 'Lers before he moved on to the Bears. Unfortunately, in 1962 there were no defensive statistics kept, save interceptions. Thus, I can only conjecture that Tommy Bettis recorded 49 tackles and 19 sacks in the third quarter, immediately after eating all that cake. The only Bettis not to be known by a transportation-related moniker, Tom had a 1-6 record as the interim coach of the Chiefs in 1977.

P.S. On my way back from lunch today, I saw the Germs walk out of the hotel in the PSFS building and into a tour bus. Pat Smear looked really high or tired or something. Then, all of a sudden, a lady in the street went on a massive tirade about how they were gonna take her baby away and put her in a shelter. She followed me into my building, where there are some social services organizations. Everybody got really uncomfortable- it was very upsetting. The net result was that I managed to encounter somebody from Nirvana and not realize it for about 90 minutes.